What to wear...

Head ache... gone... thats a good thing.

Talked to Jon he is a bit concerned over weather monday, we'll have to see what is up there.

I don't want to get stuck, but I'd rather get stuck than die...

our motto?

Don't Crash... or ... We have a system...

We do in fact have a system.

Mild Malaise

On the eve of Jon and my departure I'm feeling the Mild Malaise kicking in.

I have a bit of a headache...

doh...

A winnebago

I want a winnebago... ok really I don't... If I were going the RV route it would have to be an air stream so I could tow my silver beetle behind it... (this idea is theft sorry G & Marie) But it would still look cool.

I want peace on earth and good will towards men... Nope... wait... OK I want that too...

i'm just rambling now...

and yes you can put EZ Cheeze on a pringle... it doesn't taste so good, but it will hold up the EZ Cheeze. I guess I used to put mustard on them when I was 12 so this isn't much of a stretch...

Wrong fucking redmond

So we went to EAGLE crest resort about a week ago.

Did we see an eagle? maybe. No positive ID's on any bald eagles.

I always thought how unfair it was that the eagles were just always bald... but it turns out they hit their species pattern baldness at age 5. So they got that going for them... My head is cold. Is that normal?

So I'm coming out of the company store today in Redmond, WA ... you know where I live..

There is this big fuck off bald eagle.. and I mean he (or she I can't after all tell for 2 reasons. 1. I was on the ground and this entity was .. not.. and B I respect it's privacy) was just fucking huge and soaring up over the thermal being generated by none other than building 119. I mean shit... all that driving for nada...

I need a 600mm f/4 IS lens... I *NEED* it... It's a requirement. I need one... Do you hear me? I need it. (if I keep chanting it will come true...)

it's just so ugly now...

I can't believe I had to do that to my PC.

I really can't believe I'm upset because my machine is no longer color coordinated... is that wrong?

I mean I am a geek.

I don't even want to say how it happened or dig into the details but I can read DVD+R's now on the box and thats somehow more important than what color it was...

how do you like them apples?

We watched Good Will Hunting Last night.

The quotes in that movie just don't stop...

I can't even begin to place a favorite... retainer...

Message in a blogger

To the guy who has the fancy ass white ML 320 on 520 this morning:

Hey whiper of the ass... a mirror on the back of your vehicle in your trailer hitch receiver just reflects my fucking headlights right into my eyes... VW has also seen fit to make it impossible for me to turn off my headlights... short of removing a relay and adding some black electrical tape.

Oh... We're going...

So our ETA in LA is set for 5:00pm on Saturday. That's when we start the process of flying at 9:00am. This will be a long travel day but it's fun. My job is to arrange for our parking spot, our rental car, and our lodging. Jon makes sure we get there in a vehicle that is the same shape as when we started.

We're doing this to mark the anniversary of being crazy last year when we went to Vegas.

We don't have one big thing we're doing. We're both aiming to see people we know in LA which include AyeJaye and some other folks.

We were hoping to run into this guy we saw in Vegas last year who lives in LA who has been hard at work on a movie we want to see, but he's out of town so we won't be able to screen the movie. Not a big deal it was just something on our list.

Last year there was fear and craziness. There was even some equipment failure in Jon's single engine plane. In short we lost our artificial horizon. This is OK if you still have the real one and since we weren't in a cloud at the time we were just fine because well... We had a real horizon to play with.

Last night Jon and I made some final plans and I said, "This year isn't like Crazy MutherFucker like last year..." (we ran around a lot saying "CMF Crazy MutherFucker...We going to VEGAS")... I continued "This year isn't all out crazy, it's more like a Mild Malaise"

Yes a 3 day, 2 night Mild Malaise... It doesn't have the same ring to it as CMF... but hey... We going to LA

This is...??

a. a hoodie
b. my favorite hoodie
c. my favorite warmish shirt
d. a advert for the best lil blogging service around...
e. a hoodie!
f. all of the above
g. none of the above

email me as points will be awarded.

wow 2 pictures in one day... what will happen next?

Maybe Jon and I will go and do something crazy...

Auction Madness

Last night I went to a school auction. I had fun hanging with Marie's mom. It's always a treat.

We came up with a motto during the live auction:

"Don't get hit by a bus"... I know... words to live by.

Here you see G and I hanging out in the silent auction wondering why anybody would bid so much on a big ass glass mirror ball. Someone had done the 'buy it now" on it.



We also learned that a cute puppy plus lots-O-alcohol equals really really bad judgement.

I mean really bad.

Can you say a golden retriever puppy you don't even know went for almost 5.5K dollars. Yes K means 1000.

It was a late night...

My favorite shirt ever

This is it:



I've worn it a lot. I can thank Jon for basically giving it to me because he nominated me for the xbox beta program that sent it to me.

I wear it traveling. I wore it to Extreme Elvis (aka SlamStock). I get tons of comments mostly from women. I mean people working in best buy even comment on it.

I even offended someone with it (that was great).

It's just the best shirt ever.

Jon and I planning something crazy. I'll just have to wear it. I hope he doesn't wear his... That would be weird.

Crazy could come in less than two weeks. I'll keep you posted and this one maybe I'll write up.... Maybe... Depends on the craziness level.

word up...

This is, I think, my second favorite word in the world...

ah the homeland...

17 years ago I was in Ohio when this happened last time... it's all true.

geez i'm old.

something crazy...

Something crazy is brewing... It will likely involve air travel in a small plane... another state... or two... and something just crazy...

DVD revisit

Jon and I watched the DVD from our trip to vegas last night. Deonn and Tammy watched basicly in horror at the same time. Jon and I did lots of thums up at each other saying "We went to vegas." and we relived the trip. We were both pleased to see ourselves on the DVD, but we were both spared our closest interactions with Extreme Elvis. For a recap since I was unable to write up the trip I'll let your imagination run with "Well... Jon was... serenaded by a 300 lbs naked Elvis... and Me... well... I was... rubbed on by the same entity as he went by." Mostly we hid in the back because we were scared.

It's been a year since then. I need to do something crazy. And no Jon, I'm not talking about buying a ham....

Bend: the Trip

So we travelled this last weekend down to the middle of Oregon, which sounds very much like saying "We went to the middle of nowhwere." and in fact that is almost true. It's true in the month of April, of which this is. Near Bend, OR most things closed for the winter open May 1. And Mostly things open for the winter close at the end of March.

No wonder we got the accomadations so cheap. Also Tammy and I both had colds. Her's was worse than mine and mine wasn't much fun.

That being said, it was way fun. We took a fair amount of pictures. I wanted to get 3 times what I actually took, but we were hanging out in the room for some of it we intended to be out and about. We want to go back when it's all open seeing things like the Lava Cast forrest and the Lava Butte would be great. We got within a mile of the lava cast forrest and couldn't go any farther due to snow.

She did let me drive the whole way home which was nice. I have write ups for all but the last two days and I want to write those up tonight. I'll also post some of the photos taken digitally soon and those that require scanning after that.

Try not to take vacation when you're sick.... (just a tip)

New way to cook birds

but only if you crank this up to 11.

The ultimate Ego thing to do...

I'm pondering making a store of stuff related to my blog.

It's the most egotistical thing that's ever crossed my sick lil brain...

ok maybe not... but still. I can use cafe press and make bumper stickers that say shit like:

"FTN does not mean
Free Tibet Now"

Thoughts?

i know i'm a nut...

lunch update

ya i think something had msg or as G pointed out lettuce often carries bacteria etc. anyways I went home and took a nap and I feel better now.

If you liked Gross Pointe Blank as much as I did, or even 1/2 as much (try and measure that will you? a fraction of a subjective opinion of a movie) you should rent (not buy really) America's Sweethearts just for one scene. I'm not going to tell you which one. That would be ... wrong.

Can you say homage? now it's spelled right... thanks Brenner

lettuce

I ate lettuce for lunch. I know... I know "everybody gets a medal" but with braces on sometime your back teeth won't hit. Or they just hurt too much to even think about salad. Since my next "Adjustment" read that "torturous moments upside down with someone named 'britney' or 'jenna' saying something a kin to 'so ok you're all set, hope you have some advil'",in that super perky shove an implement down my throat kinda voice. I digressed there... ehem adjustment is coming up means i'm not in pain... so I'm eating a salad...

Only it's not.

It's lettuce, stale bread (croutons (i don't eat those fuckers)) and some kind of dry cheap cheese passed of as parimsan.

So i could eat it. I could eat it. that's my whole fucking point. nothing else.

I could eat lettuce... yay.... do I get a medal?

I have a new saying

I say, "FTN does not stand for 'Free Tibet Now'"...Thats the long, yet less profane, way of saying "FUCK THAT NOISE"...

we now return you to your regularly scheduled day...

Something Gross for Monday

charlie sent me this and it's gross. It took me a while to figure it out, but ... ICK.

Ya I'm a meme slut

so click here. You know you want to. You know that you will be lavishly rewarded by clicking... you just know it...

when you're done acting on my meme's behalf click here to read why you did it.

Want to know where I got this meme? Click here

ya so i'm Meme easy and the very fact that you're reading this means you are too... if you disagree then you just don't know it and you should read the book... and I know you clicked.

word for the day

And all along i thought this was a nasty word... silly me.

McGuyver tool update

Dude working at Woodinville Cycle speculates that there is a US patent conflict over the fact that the tool comes apart in the middle to make two folding tools. So if you want to sport a McGuyver on your bike... you'll need to grey market one from.. outside the US... so it's lucky I got mine when I did.

Yet another good reason not to leave

The USA

Life sucks for this guy.

McGuyver tools

This huge bike tool called the McGuyver is no longer available in the US. Some models of the Alien tool from are also unavailable.

I wonder why.

Do they have a tool that is illegal to sell? Maybe only the French like McGuyver now so it wasn't selling so well in the US?

I have a McGuyver from when I used to ride all the time.

I have it for protection. It’s like having an 386 assembly reference book on my shelf at work as long as I have it I won’t need it, so it keeps me out of the kernel.

I wonder if some Topeak factory worker is going to show up at my door and remove a single tool from my McGuyver and make it "street legal"... who knows...

I'm getting set to ride a whole lot more and yes I will be toting my McGuyver, legal or not, so don't fuck with me. It's like Penn always says, "Don't fuck with Sheky, because Sheky will fuck you up!"

BAH -- update

I guess the eDates and stuff is going to "work out", because now they are trying to sell me diamond rings... for only $160 plus shipping... woo hoo i'm a cheap bastard too.

BAH (Banner Ad Horoscope)

My banner ad horoscope today (BAH for short) is I'm no longer FAT. boo ya. I didn't exercise... I ate some rocky road ice cream pie (shout outs to G and Marie for bringing it by) and didn't even begin to excercise... oh wait I went to the Y and did the strider, but not for very long and low and behold when the sun came up this morning, I (according to many banner ads around the internet) am no longer needing to eDiet my way to Atkins protien based thinness... no no...

Now I have a skin disorder, allergies and they want to know if I'm a good kisser. I shit you not. Aparently I need a "love" test... um... I'd rather be fat I think...

I have a new outlook on horoscopes, fuck the astrologers. (you can do that anyways) but just go to your favorite portal page and hit refresh 3 times and write down all the things it thinks you need to change. Thats your BAH (Banner Ad Horoscope).

Try it out for 3 days, your results will vary. Actual weightloss is not at all typical, in fact you'll likely gain weight and have heart disease based on this system so don't come crying to me when you die from paying too much attention to your BAH.

Now where is that rocky road?

Tree huggin soup

I'm alergic to MSG. I know I should have to go to a 12 step program, but I don't. And it's true, I do random stuff when I've had some. I've gotten paranoid, angry, happy, nutty... it's bad you know.

So cambells soup is really just an msg delivery vector. Nothing more. It's water, some chicken and some MSG. That's it. In the case of beef its (suprisingly) water, some beef and M... S... G...

I could tell you why msg makes me have a bad (usually) day, but I won't bother, it's boring and just knowing it's not fun is all you need.

I love soup. You see the tragedy... Love soup... Hate MSG... cambells is an MSG illuminati of the highest degree.

What's the frequency kenneth? Can you say organic Alise? boo ya... soup from the organic section. Sound good? well no. Not exactly. It's all hyper tree huggin no meat and even no GMV's (that's genetically modified Veges). Fuckers. Just take the msg out, not the good stuff. The BEEF is kinda important. Genetically modify whatever you want, just but some fucking barely in the soup.

I tried two flavors. Granted number one concern is mitigated. No MSG. In the case of the split pea I tried there wasn't any sodium at all. I had to salt the hell out of it. I'm really big on Kosher salt even though I'm sooo not kosher. I have to mention here that I *know* split pea soup can be good with out MSG. Marie made some. I loved it, one of the best soups I ever had. It had some salt in it. I mean Marie made it... so it had some salt in it. She likes to salt chips one by one at Mexican restaraunts and one time when I really salted some fries she instintively stole them. I don't blame her, she really likes her salt. I mean maybe there is a Sodium Anonymous. Would that be KA? stupid chem joke.

So the soup is pretty good, but I wish the tree huggers would add some meat to the situation, but hey at least I'm not nutty, right? Right? RIGHT?

dammit

I rode 12.something miles to the park and ride yesterday after work... and those damn banner ads still think i'm fat. Jeezus is there no pleasing these things?

I really like that I need to drop a dress size...or 2