Aikido test tonight

So tonight I take an Aikido test. My first. Crazy huh? I've been working really hard to get the hours in and get my techniques to at least look miserably like what they should. Tammy is jamming and has no issues and is already working on the next test. I have to know the Japanese words for everything.

Aikido is great though. I've learned a lot and I'm sure I know my body better.

I was scared and I'm sure I'll be scared again. I wasn't scared after last night's class. I stayed after with my Test Partner (aka Uke) his name is Max and we did the whole test and I nailed it... enough.

We all take part in cleaning after class. I vacuumed the whole mat by myself slowly and methodically making sure to get every square inch. I was thinking that if I take care of the mat the mat will take care of me.

Also I was thinking that you really don't know how big something is until you've cleaned it.

As I drove out of there I wasn't afraid and I'm just now as I write this, starting to get scared...ooops. I think I just created some fear for myself. It'll go away.

Right?