The Target one hundred dollar dash
Whenever I got to Target it costs $100. I don't know why. It seems we go in for one thing and those clever bastards always get me to buy some other crap that granted I need, but still. It seems like every they should just take it out of my wallet when I walk in. It would save me some time and also I wouldn't wonder how much it's going to be.
So we have a black tri aussie in addition to our blue aussie and so we needed a new vacuum cleaner. Yes stay with me, k? So we actually borrowed one (ours has been dead for years and the cleaning invasion that happens every other week has been dealing with it for it years so we didn't have to until now) Do you know how embarrassing it is to call up your friends and ask them, "Hey I know you're coming over for dinner tonight and our house is a real mess so could you bring your vacuum for us to borrow??" So Gina and Darren brought over their vacuum and we used it. It worked really well so I wanted to get one. (See where Target fits in here?) I went to Target to get one "Just like Gina's" and I got me a dirt devil jaguar and it only cost me (along with the other crap) 59.98. I was all "holy shit I got out for less than an 100." The check out dude looked at me like I'm insane (shut up).
So I get home and start to put the mutherfucker together. I knew something was amiss when I opened the box up and there was a bag. Gina's didn't have a bag. Fuck. Tammy and I looked at it and shit I got the wrong one. So I got my ass back in the car and I took the mutherfucker back. The very nice lady behind the desk told me to go get the one I wanted and she'd do the exchange. So I went and got the 'bagless' one. (Very nice by the way I highly recommend it.) and brought it back. She did the scanning and the beeping and the typing and asked me for $42.33 which was the "difference". Well fuck me. $100 dash.
This was a while back. Why did I think of this now? I was talking to Gina a few days ago about this incident and she had just been to target that day. She told me it had been $60 so she had escaped the $100 dash. I told her they would charge me for the rest I was sure.
Yesterday Tammy and Gina went to a charity auction and I was home with the kids. Max was begging me to go to Toys-R-Us. As we started to leave he switched gears and said he could get the Bionicles at Target he was sure. I, without thinking as per usual, go, "sure."
I kept asking him how much he was gonna spend and he never really had a figure for me so whatever. He's 10 now and Samantha really wanted to clothes shop so I let him go to toy department on his own. Samantha is 7 and shouldn't know how to clothes shop. Nobody taught her really. Tammy doesn't like to clothes shop so she's very practical and just gets what's needed and gets out. She doesn't browse. How did Sam know how to do that? She looked like a pro going from rack to rack pulling stuff out and showing it to me. I was standing there with my Jaw on the floor as she pulled out a skirt and said, "Daddy this one is reversible so I can wear it with flowers or with stripes."
Cleverly I respond with "uh huh. Do you need to try it on?" She didn't know size so I had to call Tammy at the auction to find out what size top Sam needed. All this time Max was loose in the store. He came up to me right after I got off the phone. He was so proud because he couldn't find me then he did find me. That was a moment for him. He said he went this way and didn't find me then this way then over there. I started to say, "To find me in a store-" He stopped me and said, "I used my ears because you're loud daddy!" Which I have to admit is exactly what I was going to say to him too. From there Sam tried on her new outfit and we went to check out....
Total? $40.00... I guess Target trips are like celebrity deaths coming in 3's. (Which, of course, is a bunch of bullshit.) Target trips come in $100's. Thanks to Gina for saving me the $60
So we have a black tri aussie in addition to our blue aussie and so we needed a new vacuum cleaner. Yes stay with me, k? So we actually borrowed one (ours has been dead for years and the cleaning invasion that happens every other week has been dealing with it for it years so we didn't have to until now) Do you know how embarrassing it is to call up your friends and ask them, "Hey I know you're coming over for dinner tonight and our house is a real mess so could you bring your vacuum for us to borrow??" So Gina and Darren brought over their vacuum and we used it. It worked really well so I wanted to get one. (See where Target fits in here?) I went to Target to get one "Just like Gina's" and I got me a dirt devil jaguar and it only cost me (along with the other crap) 59.98. I was all "holy shit I got out for less than an 100." The check out dude looked at me like I'm insane (shut up).
So I get home and start to put the mutherfucker together. I knew something was amiss when I opened the box up and there was a bag. Gina's didn't have a bag. Fuck. Tammy and I looked at it and shit I got the wrong one. So I got my ass back in the car and I took the mutherfucker back. The very nice lady behind the desk told me to go get the one I wanted and she'd do the exchange. So I went and got the 'bagless' one. (Very nice by the way I highly recommend it.) and brought it back. She did the scanning and the beeping and the typing and asked me for $42.33 which was the "difference". Well fuck me. $100 dash.
This was a while back. Why did I think of this now? I was talking to Gina a few days ago about this incident and she had just been to target that day. She told me it had been $60 so she had escaped the $100 dash. I told her they would charge me for the rest I was sure.
Yesterday Tammy and Gina went to a charity auction and I was home with the kids. Max was begging me to go to Toys-R-Us. As we started to leave he switched gears and said he could get the Bionicles at Target he was sure. I, without thinking as per usual, go, "sure."
I kept asking him how much he was gonna spend and he never really had a figure for me so whatever. He's 10 now and Samantha really wanted to clothes shop so I let him go to toy department on his own. Samantha is 7 and shouldn't know how to clothes shop. Nobody taught her really. Tammy doesn't like to clothes shop so she's very practical and just gets what's needed and gets out. She doesn't browse. How did Sam know how to do that? She looked like a pro going from rack to rack pulling stuff out and showing it to me. I was standing there with my Jaw on the floor as she pulled out a skirt and said, "Daddy this one is reversible so I can wear it with flowers or with stripes."
Cleverly I respond with "uh huh. Do you need to try it on?" She didn't know size so I had to call Tammy at the auction to find out what size top Sam needed. All this time Max was loose in the store. He came up to me right after I got off the phone. He was so proud because he couldn't find me then he did find me. That was a moment for him. He said he went this way and didn't find me then this way then over there. I started to say, "To find me in a store-" He stopped me and said, "I used my ears because you're loud daddy!" Which I have to admit is exactly what I was going to say to him too. From there Sam tried on her new outfit and we went to check out....
Total? $40.00... I guess Target trips are like celebrity deaths coming in 3's. (Which, of course, is a bunch of bullshit.) Target trips come in $100's. Thanks to Gina for saving me the $60
posted by J.R. at 7:36 AM
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