angel mime

According to my children this mime actually rules the world.
keep it in mind.

Live from the mountain again...etc.

I think the first live from the mountain event ever was the burning bush that handed down the slabs of rock on which some commandments (without priority) were supposedly handed down. I am of course skeptical of that 10 track monster.

Live from the mountain music lounge 11 rocks. I'm listening to it now. It's a bit more varied than the last one with the greatest hits going back on it. I like them both. I'm no music expert so I don't really know much more than hey I freakin' like it.

My podcasting days are kinda pathetic. I'm just not listening enough. i've been hitting David Allen's book again via audiobook on the ole ipod. I need to buy the hard copy of the book because he lays out instructions that are all fine and good what with all the inboxes and shit, but when I'm driving down the 5 with the turbo kicked in (not really this is seattle I'm usually doing like 10 or 12 miles per hour.) It's hard to try and think about how to arrange my files. Also I need to move I can't sit still so my files need to move with me.

I did get some crap done tonight so I feel a little ahead of the curve. Just a wee bit.

The house purchase (I'm buying the house from our now broken matrimonial stuff) is going OK. I finished off the title information today and I'm working towards the loan. I have one more visit to the notary tomorrow to make sure it's me signing my own life away. I guess for that much money I'd freakin make someone give some bodily fluid dna sample so I don't complain.

I'm just dribbling now huh? I'll stop. Thanks for reading...

Flashback -- Rose Center For Earth And Space

I was digging through stuff. Like ya do when you have to clean out everything because you are getting divorced. So I found this journal I started with exactly one entry. I guess I hadn't found my medium yet, huh?

It's a spiral bound book with a metal cover with the Hayden Sphere on it at the Rose Center For Earth And Space. I had to buy it and when you read the entry I wrote on 11/25/00 you'll know why:

Purchased: 11/24/2000. Yesterday as I sat on a circular bench beneath the Hayden sphere (pictured on the cover) a man was probably 70 or so sat down next to me. He unwrapped a package he'd received for joining the museum. He opened a book exactly like the one you hold in your hands now. [ed: um this is a blog and I transcribed the entry so sorry no tactile experience] He opened the book and was shocked that it was blank. He was so shocked he spoke aloud, "It's blank." I looked over and say the book. He then showed me the book. He said that he expected it to be full of photos or pictures of the museum. He had no idea why you'd want a blank book.

I said to him, "It's for your notes as you walk about the museum. It's your handy dandy notebook."

He repeated that back to me, "Handy dandy notebook." Then he said, "There's no such thing as a free book."

Some time passed and he said, "I thought it would have had pictures."

I said, "It does. An infinite number of pictures. They just need you to develop them."

And so I simply had to have one of these books. I according to the gift shop worker got the last one they had. So begins this journal... [ed: it goes on, but it's just like the dribble here so it seems redundant to type it in]

It's signed: J.R. Hughson 11/25/00

I remember the day very clearly. I had just gotten popped in the chin by the head on one of my children. The taller one. He was trying to jump up to see some exhibit at the same time I was trying to lift him up to see it. It really rang my bell and I had to sit down to let it pass. That's when that guy came up and sat down. He wasn't pissed at all really, more just puzzled about the blank book. To his credit he very likely put more in his than I put in mine because that's the only entry in the whole thing.

I just needed to find my medium I guess. A blogger through and through.

Wake up!

I just wanted to note that my kids brought me breakfast in bed. I got toast and coke. Schweet. I have a tray now for my bed. My bedroom is phat. My kitchen is dope, so keep that in mind.



Phat!

The Harper Valley Rumor Mill is busted...

I took the kids to the PTA harvest dance. They call it the harvest dance instead of the halloween dance because some people take offense at the whole concept of halloween. I'm thinking it's misguided and uninformed christians because they associate it with wichcraft. Of course it's all hallow's eve. You know like the day before all saints' day? Isn't that a christian thing? So ya we can't call it the halloween dance. Whatever. The farther you get the church away from my public school the happier I am. I began with a digression as per usual.

The first person I see is a really nice lady who walks up and goes, "Where's Tammy?" I'm like uh... I was unprepared. Speechless. Can you imagine that? I mean come on. So I spilled it and I felt bad that I had to tell her we split in a party setting. Then it happened again. and again. I kept having to explain it. It honestly sucked. I finally snapped. I said, "Can't you people spread a rumor? This is the god damn PT-fucking-A" OK I didn't say that. I kept my cool. People were very nice about it as I would expect. I guess it says a good thing about our school, it's not a gossip pit. That's a good thing.

Of course it would have saved me some time...

phew

You Passed 8th Grade Math

Congratulations, you got 10/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

Good thing! Since I have a 5th grader and I have to stay ahead...

just a moment of crazy...

It was really a moment. A Tick if you will. Jon and I are crazy. A lot of crazy ideas we evaluate don't pan out or turn out to be ruled "stupid" instead of crazy.

That's not crazy... it's STUPID.

This was just on the crazy scale barely. It didn't take very long and It was just a little nervous tick I guess. I not so well placed gesture on the Turret's syndrome class for mimes...

We at some serious food at Med Kitchen. Then we stopped by Jon's house to make sure his elaborate television recording scheme was working copiously hard for him while we went KRAY-Z

Oh it's such a let down what we actually did. We went and raced electric go-carts.

It was fucking fun. It was fucking hard. It wasn't too expensive and where else do you get to wear something called a "head sock" that is yellow. At one point I say to Jon, "Dude you look like a little yellow Dutch girl." He retorted something more clever than what I can remember as the gist of it which (the gist) was, "ya you too." I'm sure he was much more clever than that though.

Jon wanted to walk the track so we did. I just followed him and he looked at the track and I didn't really know what we were looking for so I just followed him and tried to limit the amount of stupid that was emitting from my person. He walked... I followed. Without a clue.

So we start off with a really light lap and it was scary at first then as I got a couple done it was just fun but windy. Here's a little tip: "close your fucking full face helmet, K?" When I did that it got considerably less windy. Then he passed me a few times and I started to get discouraged then I remembered that he used to work on the driving simulation team. So ya. It would. It would kick my ass.

I can remember thinking to myself:

• Shit I'm gonna get hurt.
• Wow ok I can do this ok.
• This is fun.
• Shit he passed me.
• Man it's windy
• oh my helmet... dumbass
• Shit where is he?
• Shit there he is, just passed me, CMF.
• This is fun. I'm going faster.
• My arms are getting tired.
• Fuck that was the wall. Don't hit that again. That hurt.
• When is this going ... shit he passed me again... to be over.
• I'm tired. He just waved Jon in.
• Fuck do I have to do the last 3 laps?
• Phew no.

So then Jon explained it to me and next time I'll do better. I don't think I did bad for the first time considering the fucker can likely solve the simultaneous equations required to calculate the forces on each part of the car including the patch of tire that is in contact with the track.

Then I went home and crashed... Only not really.

Is that horse wooden?

First look at this then come back... We'll wait.

Man charged with trespassing on farm in horse-sex death

Ya ok. Ick. I could stop there couldn't I? I mean ok so you and your buddy want to do something crazy so you go criminally trespass on a place and take turns fucking a horse. (Oh the key word hits I'm gonna get off of this, huh?)

How does one do this? I'm not saying I'm an authority, I'm not. I can safely say I've never fucked a horse nor is it in any sort of plan or project I'm doing. EVER k? I mean they say, "Never say Never" but those fuckers never considered the phrase, "I will never ever fuck a horse!" It's ok to say, "never", in that case. We'll just get that right out of the way, no horse fucking. Ever! OK

I have to imagine that you need a chair or a stool and then you get behind the horse and you fuck it. OK I think I left the drinking step out. How drunk does one have to be to think this is a good idea? Then you get up on the stool and in this case apparently you fuck the horse until the horse gets a headache (not tonight honey) from it and decides to kick this shit out of your friend thus killing him. Oh don't forget the video. You gots to video tape this one. I mean really. You need to.

Police say [insert name of idiot here], 54, was videotaping his friend having sex with a horse in July when his friend "received the injuries that ultimately led to his death."

Wow ok. That's about as stupid as it gets. This horse fucker was 54 years of age. I hope the judge says something to the effect, "you fucked a horse? er... from the video we have here some horses plural. hmmm YOU are old enough to know better!" and then maybe the judge will add on, "horse fucker" to the ruling. Maybe.

So many reasons NOT TO FUCK A HORSE. Not to mention getting horse goo on the johnson region. Ick. Do they make special horse condoms? Extra thick... to keep the ick off of your... well you get it. Not much of a market likely. Er. I hope.

If they did, I'm sure they'd be by Trojan brand...

Keep it on the inside...

So I'm driving down the road like you do. I'm talking on the phone like you do. Shut up. If you aren't text messaging or something stupid it's the same as talking to someone next to you. OK I didn't have the fucking headset on, but still. OK so fine.

I see the plate: YATHED on the oldsmobile in front of me. No dashes. No spaces.

NOTHING. What? Huh? no idea. (If you know please comment so as to enlighten me and the other 2 readers that stop by on occasion, thanks!)

I couldn't figure it out. So I asked Gina (who happened to be on the phone with me, otherwise it would have been rude to the person I was on the phone with to stop and ask, right?)

She was all "I dunno" like ya do. And suggested it was likely an inside joke.

So to the driver of the olds in question: Please keep your inside jokes inside the vehicle at all times. Enjoy the ride.

pongo the plant...

Gina got me a plant to go in my newly empty bathroom when she was helping me shop for stuff. I told her I'd kill it. I said to her and the check out lady (person? what is fucking politically correct there? I know it's not "Check Out Bitch" (tm) I'm sure of it.) I told them that the plant is on it's fucking own. It better have a divining rod (or what ever the hell those dowser whacks call it. Maybe it's a dowser rod. no idea. what) Anyways that bastard better be able to get it's own water. It better be an independent plant because it isn't getting piss from me. Yes I do mean that both literally *and* figuratively. Yes you can do both.

I said it was like giving a dalmation puppy to Cruella De Ville. I think I'll make myself a garmet from this little plant... mwahahaha...

I named the fucking thing pongo.

closet envy?

Lunch...

OK so I've been on a kick about trying just about anything to eat. I normally like Meditarian food so when they had a Med-Combo meal in the cafeteria I thought, "OK."

um no.

I didn't know what most of the stuff was. Didn't slow me down at all. I tried it all. It was way bland. I've had med food that got me kicked out of the house it had so much garlic in it. This was just bland.

The salad? Bland, sorta, not good though
The Hummus? Bland
The pita? well it's bland by nature.
The Flaffle (spelling? no clue) bland. That one shouldn't be bland.
The non hummus stuff? bland but a touch sweet. Also not good.

I realize this is a super lame post. supa lamo. But I really want to be blogging more so... you get dribble huh?

My Kit-chen

Is DOPE. Photos to follow soon.

oh so wrong...

I warned you not to click here.

I honestly couldn't watch the whole thing. BEWARE.

kids clean!

yesterday

Yesterday I couldn't see. I mean that figuratively. I couldn't see the possibility.

Today, thanks to my friends, and one in particular, today I can see. Thanks to that hand full of friends you know who you are...

When I'm way out west...

Fat burger! I love the poster. Ah Chilli Cheese Fries. No I dind't have those, I just had a fat w/cheese mayo (not miracle whip no no) letuce tomato and mustard. I took it back to the apartment and it rocked. I had to get packets of ketchup because there isn't any in the apartment. I tried to watch TV... ack. Just awful. I went to bed early and read.