Truck Master here I come. What was that number?

So I've had this idea for a while where I could take on different jobs just for a few days and learn some skills. For example I don't know how to roll and enchilada. Not even half of it let alone the whole enchilada. You see what I'm saying. If I took a job in a Mexican restaurant for a few days and learned how to cook, I bet my Mexican cooking skills would go up. I'm not saying they'd be great and I'd have a secret recipe for mole sauce or anything, but I'd know what mole sauce is and how to spell it (I actually had to ask Jen just now.)

OK so switch gears just a little (like I don't do that normally). I had to go. I mean I really had to pee. We went into the safeway to get a few things you need. Like cookie dough and I really needed to pee. So it's an old safeway. Kinda beat in fact. I look around the perimeter of the store. I didn't bother looking in the middle because they don't let you just go in the frozen food section. No joy. No john. So fine I'm gonna hold it. In high school I could hold it all day because quite frankly the bathrooms were not the safest spot in the world. Then an employee asked me if I was finding everything I needed. Well actually now that you mention it I require the use of a bathroom. She lead me to the double door "employee's only -- No entrance." She says, "go right through there around the corner and up the stairs." Cool.

So on my way I see all the employee signs. The best one is in a foot ball motif that says how to make a first and 10 with the customers. The first one is what to bag and what not to bag. Where the "bag free" zone is. The next one says that you take the customer all the way to the item. Finally you ask the customer if they want help out to the car. Well since I'm back there. Employees only. I must therefore be working there I should take all this to heart. OK fine I didn't take the "No merchandise in the bathroom" sign to heart. I was carrying a bottle of nail polish remover (not for me) when I had the option to pee. There was no danger I took the shot. So OK I went back and the nail polish remover was the wrong kind so I took her all the way back to the item. I work there now, right? We decided not to buy the candy we had picked so I went and restocked it. Go me. I'm headed for that employee of the month parking space. Then we checked out. I got into a conversation with the checker (That is what they are called in the biz) about what not to bag. She pointed that she had, in fact, not bagged our paper towels. Nice. I explained about how I took Jen right to the item and I'm sure I was going to help take the stuff out to the car. Go me.

Then she gave me my change and told me to get out. No she didn't. She was very nice and pointed out that because there were two items and two people there was no need to offer to help out to the car. So that's one job done. Safeway employee done. Next up? Truck driving school. I've always wanted to double clutch and hire a lumper to unload my rig...